


Panic attacks and batman band-aids

by flowers476



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: & reader, Angst, Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Panic Attacks, and reader - Freeform, x Reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-06 15:40:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11039187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowers476/pseuds/flowers476
Summary: "It'll be okay, i'm nearly there!"The reader has a panic attack and Nishinoya comes to take care of them.





	Panic attacks and batman band-aids

The faint, sick feeling that had weighed on you all day was getting harder to ignore. You stood in the middle of the grocery aisle, halfway through your shopping, when the anxiety you'd been trying to avoid, hit like a train. Struggling to calm your breath while the volume of the customers around you turned up in your oversensitive ears. You had to decide if you were going to push through and finish shopping or leave and try again tomorrow.

Your mind got cloudy as you fought the brain fog trying to make the decision, when another wave of panic threw you with a heavy weight of pressure on your chest. Giving in, you put down your partially filled basket and walked quickly and quietly to the exit.

One of the reasons you chose your apartment was because it was so close to the shop and your school. Knowing your regularity of panic attacks, you didn't want to be too far from home.

Starting to sweat as the sun beat down, you began to feel dizzy from your shallow breaths. Your apartment was in your sights down the road, but it felt like a million miles away.

So much fear filled your body, feeling the trauma from public panic set in. A few people passed you on the street, but as always, no one noticed your inner turmoil. 

You walked slowly and cautiously, just trying to keep your legs moving until you got home. But, suddenly your leg gave out and you stumbled to your knees. Tears welling up in your eyes as you felt the pain of your scratched up hands from trying to catch yourself on the pavement.

You pulled the neck of your shirt up to wipe your eyes, still in the middle of this goddamn panic attack. Why couldn't it wait just a few more minutes until you could make it home?? Not that your anxiety ever gave a shit about when it showed up.

Still on your scratched up knees, you felt broken and done. Backpack dropped at your side.

*ring ring*

In the midst of your breakdown your phone began to ring. So you moved your hand to your bag pocket to pull it out.

"Hello?" you spoke quietly.

"F/N?" You heard the familiar voice of your favorite person.

"Hey Noya." trying to keep your voice steady so he wouldn't worry.

"I'm done practice, did you already walk home?" he asked.

"Um, sort of. I tried to go buy some groceries for dinner on the way, but ended up getting a bit overwhelmed so I bailed. Now i'm just on my way home." You tried to be honest but not dramatic. Still breathing shallow in your throat.

"Overwhelmed? are you okay??" 

"Um, yeah, i'm okay.. i think" you said, with a slight hitch in your throat that you couldn't catch.

"Where are you? I'm on my way to your place now" his voice was concerned but steady.

"I'm.. i'm just on the path leading from the shop to my apartment, near the white fence," your resolve quickly deteriorating. "But you d-you don't have to come" trying so hard not to be a burden on him.

"What? No! Of course i'll come. Stay where you are, i'll be there soon" 

"o..okay. Thanks Noya." You felt guilty, but so grateful. Honestly unsure if you could get home on your own at this rate.

-

He stayed on the phone as you held it to your ear in silence. Letting out quiet sobs as you could hear him start to run.

"It'll be okay, F/N, i'm nearly there" he said, through his faster breaths.

You managed to slowly crawl closer to the side of the path. More tears fell from your eyes, your head hurt and you just wanted to curl up and disappear. So tired from your string of bad days, on top of your recent step to live on your own.

Lost in thought and dizziness, you faintly heard your name being called. Coming back to reality from your daze, you turned to see your partner running towards you. Almost tripping on the rocky path as he skidded to a halt.

"F/N" Seeing you on the ground, he hung up his phone, kneeling down and reaching to hang up yours in your hand.

You found yourself unable to meet his eyes, embarrassed and disappointed in yourself. Nishinoya looked at your face, calmly, and began to wipe your tear soaked cheeks with his hands.

"Sorry." you answered. A few more tears falling.

"Sorry for what? why didn't you call me sooner? I didn't realize you were feeling so badly." He looked so concerned, now noticing your hands and knees.

"Oh F/N. Okay. Let me help, please?" speaking with your hands in his.

"Yeah. O-Okay." you stammered, holding onto his hands a bit more desperately. Just wanting to get home.

Nishinoya felt sad, you'd had panic attacks before but it'd been a while since they hit you hard enough to stop you from moving on your own. You looked as rough as you felt.

"Can you breathe? Can I move you?" gaining your eye contact.

You were still finding it hard to speak, breathing only through your mouth. Noticing this, he moved a bit closer to you, still on the ground. Nishinoya placed one hand on your heart, taking your other hand to place it over his.

"Okay, let's try breathing in through our noses for a bit, okay?" he had spent a lot of time over the last year learning about coping strategies and what he could do as your partner to help you in crisis. You appreciated this more than you let on.

You nodded in agreement. "1... 2... 3..." you slowly forced yourself to breathe in through your nose. "And out through your mouth... 2... 3..." he continued to breathe with you for a little while longer. People passing by, staring, but neither of you noticed anyone else. 

Eventually your breath and heart rate began to slow. 

"That's it." Nishinoya coo'd with a comforting smile of relief.

"Noya, wi-will you take me home p-please?" clenching his hand a little harder, you felt so guilty for putting this on him again. But you really did need help, and he was your person.

"Of course, that's why I'm here. Give me your hands." he stood, then reached both his hands down to pull you up. You felt weak, still coming down from your attack, exhausted. You grabbed his arm for balance.

"Here," Nishinoya turned to face away from you, moving his backpack to his front. "Get on." 

Normally you'd make some remark about being to heavy, but you couldn't even think fully at the moment so you climbed onto your boyfriends back.

"There you go, light as a feather" Nishinoya wrapped his arms around your legs as you gently leaned your head against his neck. Breathing still slowing down, but his body heat and familiar smell helped that along. Closing your eyes, with your arms around his shoulders, he took you home.

\- 

Leaning forward so as not to drop you, he pulled out his keys, and unlocked the door with one hand. Once inside, he gently let you down and went to close it. You kicked off your shoes and dropped your bag to the ground. Finally touching your face, realizing how much of a mess you were as you winced from the scratches on your knuckles.

"Let's get you to bed. Just a few more steps" he said sweetly as he took your hand and guided you to your bedroom. Your little apartment wasn't as clean as it usually was, with all the stress you'd been dealing with you hadn't had the energy to tidy.

Nishinoya brought you to the bed and helped you sit down. Leaving your hand, he walked over to your dresser to grab you a change of clothes. A pair of cropped sweatpants and one of his old t-shirts that you liked to sleep in. Grabbing a cloth from the clean laundry basket (that also hadn't been put away), and he brought everything over to you. You'd just been quietly sitting there, examining your wounds and your current shitty situation.

Sitting down next to you on the bed, Nishinoya helped you out of your hoodie. Making sure to be tender, trying to reassure you from your feelings of inadequacy and letting him down.

"It's alright. I don't have any practice or work tomorrow so i'm all yours. I know you prefer to hide, but can I stay?" Nishinoya asked, meeting your eyes. 

You nodded, attempting a smile. 

"Thank you." Nishinoya felt grateful you agreed. He really just wanted to help, he never felt resentment towards you.

Once you were changed into your comfortable clothes, Nishinoya moved all the pillows how you liked them and gently lay you down. He pulled the comforter over you as you let out a somber sigh. He stayed with you for a few minutes, running his hand across your forehead and through your hair.

"You know I love you, right? and that you're safe when you're with me?" he spoke low, but with a kindness you adored so much.

"I know." you opened your eyes to look at his. "I love you too, Noya" you gave a small smile as he moved some hair behind your ear.

Nishinoya smiled softly. "I'll be right back okay?" letting go of you and making his way to the door. 

"Noya?" you tried to speak up so he'd hear you.

"Yeah baby.?"

"Thanks."

He smiled wide, and nodded, leaving your room and into the hallway.

-

You woke to the sound of music coming from outside your room. Rubbing your eyes, still sore from how much you clenched your body a few hours before. Sitting up slowly, you removed the blanket to notice a couple band-aids on your knees, and then noticing the 4 on your fingers. Giggling to yourself, your tired heart warming up in your chest.

You stood up only to finally see yourself in the mirror. Your baggy bottoms and Nishinoya's junior high volleyball t-shirt mixed with your messy hair and exhausted eyes, this wasn't a great look for you, you thought. Scoffing at your broken appearance, you wiped your eyes with the bottom of the shirt.

As you opened the bedroom door, you could hear your boyfriend humming along to the radio. Making your way to the kitchen, you could only smile as he moved to the music while he cooked. Sitting down at one of the chairs at the table, Nishinoya looked up at the sound. He put his spoon back in the bubbling pot and made his way over to you. Kneeling down in front of you again so his head was lower than yours. Taking both your hands and kissing them.

"You slept." he said, relieved.

"I guess I was more tired than I thought." you said, with a hint of guilt.

"Yeah, I went to get the first aid kit and you were out before I got back." he chuckled.

"I'm so sorry, again, for all this. I do love the batman band-aids you picked though." you said as you smiled, motioning to your hands and knees.

Nishinoya sighed at the sight, reaching one hand to your cheek. "I missed you." you blushed. You'd been so distracted and stressed that you had let everything fall to the wayside, including your boyfriend.

"I thought I could handle everything on my own. Clearly I was wrong" you winced but laughed through it. Nishinoya shook his head.

"But you don't have to handle everything alone. I'm here. That's what partners do, we deal with the hardships together." he pleaded calmly, "It hurts to think it was so bad that you had to leave the store, and then you fell, all without me. I want to help carry some of the weight you're holding. It's time you really let me in F/N." he was looking right into your eyes, as you moved to look away out of shyness.

"I have let you in. It's just, not that important okay? I'm fine a lot of the time, it's my fault for letting it get this bad." you avoided his kind words, feeling bad enough that he was stuck with you for a girlfriend.

"Except we're together, F/N, and even after years of friendship and a year of going out, you still try not to ask me for help. I wish you would."

He was right, you had always avoided asking for help unless there was no other option. But it was all because you worried he'd leave you or resent you if you showed him too much negativity. 

"I just think you deserve someone that doesn't start crying at the grocery store. Someone who can be a positive addition, not a dreary one" you met his hands in your lap again.

"F/N. There is so much more to you than this, but you're so blind to your good qualities. I love everything about you. You're funny, you're smart, you're sweet, you'll run around and be silly with me, you're sexy-" his smile curling in cheeky way. "And this just happens to be a part of who you are. So if i can, I want to help make it as easy as possible. If that means we go to the store together, then let's do it! I'm here so much anyway I could always bring food over too-"

You stopped him with a finger to his mouth. He looked up at you with his big dark eyes, his hands rubbing your outer thighs in reassurance. You leaned your head against his forehead. "Thank you." you whispered. He smiled and moved to plant a kiss on your lips. 

-

Noticing the boiling noise getting louder, you pulled away. Nishinoya noticed and perked up, "Are you hungry? I made some dinner." He stood, pleased with himself.

"I actually am" you laughed at his proud stance. He went to stir the pot, leaving you at the table to admire his band-aid handy work. 

"Hey Noya?" you let out unexpectedly.

"What's up, my love?" Nishinoya said, clearly in a better mood now that you were more calm.

"School ends next week and we're both going to university in the fall-" you cut off.

"Yeah, and?" 

"What are you planning to do this summer?" You asked.

He continued to stir the soup. "Probably just work, preparing for uni, maybe a few pick up games with my friends. Gotta start looking for an apartment, all that. Why?"

You took a deep breath. "Would you maybe want to live.. here? with me?" your face flushed, hands slightly clenched together. He turned.

"For real? you want me to move in?" he asked, seemingly surprised at your offer.

"I mean, only if you want to. I might be hard to live with, but the option is there if you want it." you said, bashfully fidgeting in your seat.

He walked straight over to you, bending to grasp your face with both hands.

"Definitely yes!"

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't going to publish this originally because I didn't think it was that well written. I wrote this during one of my panic attacks recently to see if I could make myself feel any better. I hope if you're having anxiety that you will feel better soon too. 
> 
> If you found a gendered pronoun in here please let me know and i'll fix it!
> 
> Thanks for reading, leave a comment and let me know how I did :)


End file.
